"A wise son heeds (responds to) his father's instruction (discipline), but a mocker does not respond (listen) to rebuke." Proverbs 13:1 (ICB/CSB)
We begin with this chapter on provers with DISCIPLINE. As parents and grandparents we want to leave a spiritual inheritance. We wanted to bring up our own children, so that they could learn how to bring up their own. My biggest prayer every day as a mother, was that Aaron would have a LOVE for the Lord and that HE WOULD SERVE HIM IN THE CHURCH. Also, he would marry a Christian woman and they would bring up their children WISELY, as my parents had brought me up.
"But as for me and my househould, we will SERVE THE LORD." Joshua 24:15b (NIV)
"A good person leaves an inheritance for their grandchildren." Proverbs 13:22a (NLT)
1. LISTEN TO PARENTAL ADVICE
Honouring parents is high on GOD'S LIST of priorities. Family life and good parenting is so important. Nothing in the Bible condones violence - cruelty towards children, but children need to be disciplined and they need to respect their parents.
"I have four boys and I work with children everyday. You need to have communication skills - check that they understand what is expected of them. Discipline is not corporal punishment. The "rod" is not the 1st resort, but it is the last plan for disobedience. Children need to have clarity and understanding of the rules in their home and family. You don't beat them because they have made you mad, but discipline them because YOU LOVE THEM, and want the best for them." Dees Rees
"I adopted two girls, and my wife and I had to sign two documents that said we weren't allowed to spank our daughters. Discipline is an EXPRESSION OF GOD'S LOVE and OURS. We try and be patient, to talk things through with them. We want them to know they can LOVE AND TRUST US. The consequences have to be real - through cause and effect. They need to be punished when they disobey us, but in LOVE NOT FEAR. It's not about POWER, BUT LOVE!" Peyton Jones
"Whoever spares the rod hates the child, but the one who loves children is careful to discipline them." Proverbs 13:24 (NIV)
"Children, always oney your parents, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers do not aggravate your children, they will become discouraged and they may want to stop trying." Colossians 3:20&21 (NLT)
2. GUARD YOUR LIPS
"Those who guard their lips will preserve their lives, but those who speak rashly will come to ruin." Proverbs 13:3 (NIV)
Here we go again - there are many more Proverbs that remind us that the TONGUE can bring us TROUBLE. It can do a lot of damage if we don't THINK BEFORE WE TALK! We need to ALWAYS USE WORDS CAREFULLY in all situations. Wisdom is contagious, but it can also lead to folly.
"As a psychologist/nurse, I learnt how to speak politely."As a Chaplain/Counsellor/Teacher, working with children was a real challenge. We often experiened some "conflict". You remember that Jesus was a great Shepherd who helped you to "redirect His flock". Peyton Jones/Dees Rees
"It is impossible to overestimate the importance of your WORDS and CONTROLING YOUR TONGUE." Nicky Gumbel
"Where there is strife (arguments), there is pride (arrogant know it alls stir up discord), but wisdom is found in those (wise men who listen to each other) who take advice." Proverbs 13:10 (ICB/NIV/MSG)
"Walk with the wise (spending time with people) will become wise. But whoever makes friends with fools will suffer." Proverbs 13:20 (NIV/ICB)
Whether it is in a marriage, friendship or any relationship, even in a Church, there will be "quarrels", because there will always be PRIDE. We need to learn to LISTEN CAREFULLY and admit when we are WRONG or MAKE MISTAKES. Most of all, as we were reminded in the last Proverb, we need to be HUMBLE, GENTLE AND KIND, an encouragement to another with our WORDS.
3. HARD WORK, PERSEVERENCE, TRUTH
"Lazy people want much but get little (they will not get what they want), but those who WORK HARD will prosper (the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied, they get what they want)." Proverbs 13:4 (NLT/NIV/ICB)
"Unrelenting disapointments (hope deferred) leave you heart sick, but a sudden good break (a dream fulfilled is a tree of life) can turn life around." Proverbs 13:12 (MSG/NLT)
Hard work is a blessing! It requires perseverence and lots of "enthusiasm". We may be sad, and disapointed when our prayers aren't answered the way we want. Like Solomon said "his heart was sick".
"Disapointment can really make us feel ill if we let it fester. It will eat away at us. There is only one answer: to TAKE IT TO GOD and to TRY AND LET GO OF IT. Trust in God's sovereignty - that's always easier!" Pippa Gumbel
God's vision will be finally fulfilled through you, in PERSEVERENCE, with "great joy, fulfillment and satisfaction".
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that easily entangles. Let us run with perseverance the race that is marked out before us." Hebrews 12:1 (NIV)
"The righteous (good people) hate what is right and false. Doing what is RIGHT protects the HONEST PERSON Proverbs 13:6 (NIV/ICB)
We are to hate dishonesty and LOVE TRUTH. Integrity does not mean we need to be perfect, but God does want us to be HONEST, AUTHENTIC AND REAL.
4. PICKING FRIENDS GOD'S WAY
"Whoever spends time with wise people will become wise. But whoever makes friends with fools will suffer." Proverbs 13:20 (ICB)
When you want to sharpen a pencil, you want to find a good sharpener. The same is true with FRIENDS! If you want to find a friend you need to be WISE! If you want to find a good person you have to hang around with the right people - both at school and at Church.
Ask God to help you draw closer to Him, so He can help you develop and grow closer in faith with FRIENDS. GOOD, MATURE CHRISTIAN FRIENDS take time to find, but they are worth it. They usually last a LIFETIME!!
"HOLY BIBLE - NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION", 2011, Biblica
"INTERNATONAL CHILDREN'S BIBLE", 2015, Tommy Nelson
"THE MESSAGE - THE BIBLE CONTEMPORARY LANGUAGE", 2018, Eugene H Peterson , NavPress/Tyndale House Publications.
"CHRISTIAN STANDARD BIBLE", 2017, Holman Bible Publishers
"Walk With the Wise", 2019, Jim Spencer (Composer), Spencer Family (Performers), Crossway/ESV Good News Publishers/YouTube
Jones, Peyton, Ross TeDese, "Walk With the Wise - Proverbs 13" ,2026, Though the Word
Gumbel, Pippa & Nicky, "How to Respond to Conflict"/"How to Finish Well" - (2026) "The Bible in One Year" (2009), Alpha International/YouVersion
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